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    Turning 30: What I have learned so far…

    Written by: Elyse Sinsay

    With my 30th birthday just around the corner, I began to think the other day… 30 is a big deal. You are not 8 getting the keys to freedom. You are not 21 finally legally able to order a drink. You are not 25, a quarter of the way through your life. You are 30, you have your shit together. You have a husband, a house, a good job, kids a car, blah, blah blah. Well, at least you are supposed to have all those things. By 30 you are supposed to be this educated beauty amongst the insecure 20-somethings and you hold your head up high…

        • Life is not about getting or finding the guy. Yes, this may be a tough one to swallow, but what I have learned is that love really does come to you when you least expect it in the oddest of forms. So throw your diary and list of requirements out. Who you will be with will be who you will NEED and that is way more than just someone you WANT. Case and point my husband. I have always been attracted to a surfer dude. You know, blonde hair blue eyes? But HE is a Filipino, with black hair and brown eyes. This man, though, makes me so freaking happy and I feel so safe with him that what I THOUGHT I
          wanted wasn’t what I REALLY needed.
        • Going to the gym is NOT about getting skinny… when I was younger I used to think,“If I could only lose 10 more pounds!” I’m sure everyone has been there. Now that I am older I go to the gym or rather I work out for me. For my health, to feel better. NOT about how I look in a certain size of clothing but how I FEEL in MY clothing. You can look awesome in a pair of yoga pants if you own it, just as you can look smoking in a LBD… It doesn’t matter anymore what I put on. It’s how you carry yourself in the outfit that matters, and you just gotta feel good to get into it in the first place.
        • Makeup application does not require a ½ hour. When getting ready I used to do the whole routine; foundation, blush, eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara, lipstick, everything. Some days it would take longer if I wanted to achieve an eyeliner that was just right…You KNOW what I’m talking about! But have you ever just put a little tinted moisturizer, eyeshadow, mascara and lip gloss on? Gasp! You say. Well, I say do it. It’s such a time saver and so much better for your skin. You really should be highlighting your features, not putting a bunch of crap on your face. Playing with makeup is over ladies, keep it fresh. Besides, I don’t know how many times my husband compliments me with less make up on than with more. DON’T LIVE A CAKE FACE LIE!!!
        • Waxing is a requirement!! Ok, here is where it gets rea. Waxing or at least general hair removal is a requirement by 30. It is thicker, it grows faster and not on your head! Every. Where. Else. In your 20’s you take care of your eyebrows, legs and lady parts (however, you see fit) but at 30 YOU HAVE CHIN HAIRS!! WTF!? When did those bastards come in? And it’s just one or two but enough to be mortifying like a pimple that you are sure EVERYONE can see. Seriously, not cool.
        • If you have kids, you loosen the grip… a bit. By now I have gotten used to the things that my kids do and some of the things that my little one does my oldest did. So you know what I do? I let the little butt head get into trouble. Now, I’m not saying let them go all whilly nilly, but from time to time I let the kids fall, I let them learn. (With me watching of course) but I don’t jump up every time they need me or every time they cry. I let them figure it out. Why, you might ask? Because I want them to grow up knowing that they can take care of themselves and that they are strong. If I run to the each and every time they fall they won’t ever learn to pick themselves up and brush themselves off, saying “that wasn’t so bad”. Character is what I want for my kids, not meekness.
        • Netflix is for grown-ups. Really! Is not really for kids, yes they have a kids section but every time you put it on they fall asleep, and it’s not for the 20-somethings because they are all about the latest and greatest, “what happened on last night’s episode of…” IT’S FOR GROWN UPS. Why? Because we have real jobs that require too much of our time and when we finally have time to sit down and watch something we are too many seasons behind. Then there is Netflix to the rescue. So we cozy up and start catching up and the next thing we know we are binge watching Breaking Bad or Sons of Anarchy because like I said we stopped watching and its 2AM….. Must… turn…off…
        • My relationship with food is restored. So this ties into going to the gym. I go to the gym to feel good, to be healthy but also because I love food. I mean it was my career for heaven’s sake! But fuck eating salads and smoothies for the rest of my life. If I want a damn cupcake, guess what?! I’m gonna eat it! And you know what else, it was delicious! I mean I still eat salad and drink smoothies but that is just not all there is to my dieting life. I have also found that when I don’t deprive myself of my food desires I am a much happier mama. Just sayin, diets are not all they are cracked up to be. Eat less, work out, drink water, and be happy.
        • Farting and burping are a part of life, embrace it. Yes, farts are smelly and gross. Yes, burps can be smelly as well, but if you deny that you do it that is half the fun. I’m not saying that everyone needs to be farting and burping on everyone, because well, gross, but in our house we embrace our grossness. We call each other out on it, make jokes about it and even chase each other through the house to drop bombs on each other. It’s fun, funny, and a family thing. We even have code name for farts: barking spiders, poots, bombs and duces. Our burps we grade on a scale of 1-10 in loudness and on some occasions you get bonus points for talking while you burp. Seriously. But we never do any of this while we are out at a restaurant or have company over, we aren’t THAT gross. It’s just that I have learned to have fun with my kids in unusual ways because well, it’s funny.
        • Pampering yourself is a must. Find at least one thing that makes you feel like a lady. I know that by 30, if you have the kids the husband and everything else, doing things for yourself may seem like a chore but it really is a must. For me it’s a mani-pedi. I don’t even go to the salon to get it done. I have a pretty steady hand and use nap time to my advantage. I take that time to do this small thing for me. Make my nails look good. It gives me that extra boost of confidence when I need it in the craziness of life. If this is not your thing or if you don’t have a steady hand just do you honey boo boo. All I am saying is take the time to do a little something for yourself. We women tend to take care of everyone else a little too much. Having pretty toes won’t kill anyone…

    Extended family time is important. Anytime I can see my family or my husband’s family we make time to do so. Just sitting with my mom, dad, brother and sisters precious time that we take for granted. But it’s not just the time that I get that I cherish, it’s the time that my kids get to spend with their grandparents, their aunts, uncles, and cousins that matter. Making lasting memories should always be a top priority no matter how busy your schedule is. Single or not, make time to see your family, you don’t know how much time you really have with them. Make every moment count.

    Well I could go on and on but those were at the top of my list of what I have learned. The next blog will be my birthday dinner review of a pizza place. I love pizza. So excited about this one. Until then ladies… Have a very merry un-birthday to you!
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    Photography by: Jeffery Cruz

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